Dear all, I recently received a question from a blog reader about how Irene and I maintain a long distance relationship while we are both in school. I agree. There definitely have been difficult or frustrating times, but Irene and I love each other, trust each other, and work hard in keeping each other happy, even when we are both busy in school, and across the ocean from each other. We accept that there will be challenges, but we both know we are building a greater future together and that a few years of being apart is nothing compared to a lifetime together afterwards. I end my day everyday with Irene. Sometimes during the school semester, I would even find a less-busy weekend to go visit Irene, like one of the weekends after block exams.
Dating long distance medical school
I think in many ways, Irene and I have strengthened our relationship over the semesters during this long-distance experience. We recently just got engaged. Congratulations on your engagement! I understand the struggles of maintaining a long-distance relationship with someone.
It is no doubt quite difficult but as you have mentioned, if you love and trust each other, then you are determined to make it work. I maintained a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend now husband for four years before we finally got married and lived together.
Anyway, love your blog and congratulations!
Thanks Tanya for the encouraging words! I will definitely keep them in mind Irene is worth the wait!
Wellness Wednesday: Romance in Medical School
B Busy. We all say that word at least once a day.
Well, with us both being busy during the day, we decided to take an MMA workout class together in order to hang out and stay on top of our health. Though sometimes we throw physical punches at each other in that class, it helps relieve our stress with school. And it helps us to be silly yet competitive with each other!
C Communicate - Let your significant other KNOW when you have an exam coming up, let them KNOW if something is bothering you even if it might seem irrelevantlet them KNOW how upset it actually made you that they ate the last of the salsa in the fridge.
Otherwise you might implode - and no one wants to see that, not even your Momma. G Gut feeling that something is wrong?
Maintaining a Long Distance Relationship in Med School By Benji Ho - June 12th, | ated October 4th, Dear all, I recently received a question from a blog reader about how Irene and I maintain a long distance relationship while we are both in school. May 04, I know med school is a whole different beast than undergrad, and I have a lot of doubts and misgivings about trying to do long distance during it. My SO and I were 2, miles apart for years (while I was in undergrad), and we will likely be doing it through med school (I would be 6 hours away if I choose the school I'm leaning towards).
See above note about dog. You want to spend time with your significant other, your family, and your friends, but you also have tons of studying to do, or are working long hours when doing rotations.
The most helpful thing for me to do was plan ahead and prioritize. Giving people the heads up about my schedule really helped!! Just having them understand what I was doing on a regular basis made it feel like we were in this together.
Making sure your relationship is successful comes down to time management and making sure your SO is a top priority. And one of the things that really helped them was that before she moved to Thailand, she visited Miami and she saw his apartment.
They walked around the medical school. So being able to picture it made her connect to his world.
Dating a Premed or Medical Student Long-Distance. For Sarah, this is one of the hardest parts, especially for the significant other. Because medical school is rigid. You're going to be somewhere for four years. Sarah and Brian were actually long distance during his first year of medical school because Sarah was in Thailand. May 30, I resisted dating my long-time friend for months after it became obvious that we were "a thing" because we were about to graduate from college, and he was moving 12 hours away from me to begin medical school. A long-distance relationship with a medical student? No way, I thought. That sounded like a terrible idea. Eventually, though, I gave in. Relationship Status: Long-distance "Long distance dating during medical school is definitely hard, for sure, but if you really love that person, then don't be afraid! Yes, you lose the luxury of being in each other's presence, so you need to make up for it somehow.
She was able to picture what he was doing and who he was spending time with. The hardest part for them was Brian not being able to conceive what her life was like in Thailand. She was living in a fishing village and teaching Thai children their ABCs. And being unable to come to visit her to get a sense for her world was difficult.
They also had to grapple with the fact that before they were long distance, they could pick up and talk to each other whenever. So consciously making times to Skype with each other was vital. They had to prioritize it, even if they were both tired or it was first thing in the morning.
He had to miss an event or something like that. They had to put in enough face time.
And things changed considerably. He came to Thailand over winter break, and Sarah claims it saved their relationship.
Sarah says the first year of living in Miami was harder on her than on Bryan. At least they had set expectations when they were apart. They created routines to make sure they were talking to each other.
Medical school demands many sacrifices, but should finding a romantic partner be one of them? When it comes to long-distance relationships while pursuing medicine, there is . Aug 31, Long-distance medical relationships will never be easy, especially with a medical student. They require intentionality, consistency, and ninja-level communication skills. But it can be done. Good luck to you. Sarah Epstein is author of the upcoming book, Love in the Time of Medical School, and blogs at DatingMed. Image credit: accessory-source.comhor: Sarah Epstein. MS1 here. A couple months into the long distance thing, and I'm struggling to balance school, my personal time, and time with my s.o. Just wanted to get a sense of how others are handling it and what kind of agreements they have with their s.o. to make it all work.
But when she moved to Miami with a new job and a new apartment, he had his friends, his routine, his support system. And he had an exceptionally busy schedule. The second year was difficult since Bryan had to start studying for Step 1. Once again, they had to re-negotiate what their time together would look like.
Basically, Sarah ended up being the third wheel to medical school. Bryan did a few things to make it work that Sarah considered to be really vital. Brian was good at keeping her aware of what his schedule would look like. He made her feel she knew where he was going to be and he stayed in touch when he had to study longer than he thought. Or when he had to go to an extra lab.
Additionally, small gestures became a lot more important, like taking the time to take a study break and go out for coffee. Sarah describes medical school as being very busy, but there are points in the schedule that are less busy than other points. When the schedule is less busy, you try to put some time in the bank.
He would leave her post-it notes around the house telling her he missed her. Being in Miami, Sarah says she was able to hang out with groups and medical students and describes it as quite an experience in terms of feeling a sense of alienation.
That would be how she would meet other SOs going through the same thing. But then this friend texted Sarah and said her boyfriend was going to bed at eight, and she was setting her schedule to meet his, so she asked if they could do wine early, at five.
Sarah agreed, of course, because she gets it. It makes a big difference to have friends who understand that. In terms of having a support system, Sarah says that anyone dating a medical student really needs to tap into an emotional support system. Find those specific people in your network.
Not everyone is equally good to vent to. So have one or two people that you can call up and say you just need to talk for a few minutes. Find those people who get it. Sarah is also a big fan of therapy as a support system.
In terms of study periods, Sarah considers Step 1 as by far the hardest. There were so many conversations they had to put on hold. And both people had to go into long-term thinking mode.
Rotations are also difficult at the beginning in third year. First and second are difficult but predictable. But third year is incredibly uaccessory-source.comedictable.
Not only is your partner doing a different rotation every month, but they also have a different schedule. They have different attending physicians to make the experience easier or more difficult. That said, it was important for them to look at the schedule in advance as much as they could, or have Brian talk to classmates about what this rotation was like, so they can prepare themselves. So this became a very important part of their preparation. Obviously, surgery was really tough since he was working very long days.
They had an unusually difficult time with his pediatrics rotation because they both expected it to be a very light rotation.